Narcissists Are Such Destroyers

People often ask me why I use Nyles' name when I blog. It's simple really. When people Google him, my blog comes up. I want it to come up because if someone is Googling his name they are seeking answers and trying to figure out what that nagging feeling is that "something isn't right". I wish to God that I had been able to find someone to answer my questions, someone to give me the truth.

I got another email tonight....

Although I am sure that Nyles' insanity has ruined any chance we have of truly trusting each other, I wanted to let you know that I am still reading your blog when I can, and finding all your emotions way too familiar. Today I am having a bad day, I suppose that is why I logged on to your blog this afternoon. A few things have transpired since we (you and I) last spoke, and, although I never had any idea of getting back together with him after what he had already put me through, he did continue to make it worse, basically denying anything he had ever said to me, telling me that "Casey" was the one in his life, and that I should have known it would never have worked.

I have, as of late, contacted a couple more people, and then received a very irritated email from him this morning, followed by a wonderful story about his latest trip to Mexico, which for some reason I should be happy about for him....

Is a man truly insane that believes his own lies?

The thing is....narcissists aren't insane. Insane people do things that they don't understand are wrong. A narcissist, when given a choice, will do the thing that causes the most damage because they feed off the control and power it gives them. Knowing that their words and behavior kill another person's spirit makes a narcissist down right giddy.

Nyles has moved on to the next woman. In about four months....well two or three at this point....she will begin to feel this nagging that something isn't quite right. She will voice it to him and he will blame her. She will try and figure out what is going on and he will charmingly inform her that it is just her past talking and if she would just trust and act appropriately they would have a nice, long happy life together.

What she doesn't know, is that a narcissist cannot be with just one woman. He is already with at least one other person....probably two since I know now that in the four years I have known him, he has always been with three at a time.

Until she is hit between the eyes with the facts that this man (and I use the term lightly) sleeps with everything that lays down in front of him.....she will believe his charming lies because he is just that good.

She was in a vulnerable state when she met him. She was hurting and he came in and literally became what she needed in that moment. How do I know that? Because I have spoken to so many of his victims. The story is always the same.

Two years healing wasted on this man and another two before that wasted on loving him.

I have spoken to women from twenty years ago who were fed the same lies and promises with never any intention of seeing them through. Twenty years from now, I suspect their will be an additional group of women who are destroyed by this horrible man.

My heart breaks for their future pain. My heart rejoices that I am free to love and be happy. May the woman who sent me the email heal and recover her beautiful life quickly.