So I've had three people ask me for a follow up to the Birthday Insanity man Mr. CraigsList. I usually don't take requests for anything....Well....here’s an update….oh and for the record this is probably an "R" rated blog moment....
I guess the first thing I must ask is why men seem to think that sending a picture of the penis is inviting in any way to a woman.
Please ladies, let’s see a show of hands as to if any of you have pursued a relationship with someone based on a picture of their nether regions.
I don’t get it. I just don’t. Mr. CraigsList, who was my birthday delight, turned into a nutcase of Biblical proportions. He sent me a picture on the following Monday night of his nether regions. Only it wasn’t a rock hard, “come here baby I miss you” picture….it was an “I just got out of a cold pool” picture. The sucker was less than two inches.
One, I’d already told him that I chose him because he DIDN’T send me a picture like that when I was advertising for a dinner date. Did he forget that? Or maybe I should ask, "How does one forget something like that"?
When we talked a few days later, I expressed again how much I don’t appreciate that sort of stuff except it is way fun when my friends and I get together and drink while comparing the absurdity of even publishing something like that on the internet. I mean for goodness sake, this man is in his 60’s. I told him once again how those types of pictures always make me wonder how many other women have been sent that picture. I mean really!
His response…."What are you doing Wednesday night? I know your kids are gone so would you like to pick me up at the ferry and I can keep you warm in your bed?"
Alrighty let’s review…
Drive to ferry after my children leave – ½ hour
Drive back to my place – ½ hour
Chitchat as I show him around and then chitchat as we are putting our clothes back on – ½ hour
Drive back to the ferry to drop Mr. CraigsList off – ½ hour
Drive back home before my children get home – ½ hour.
That leaves us 15 minutes for sex. Yes ladies….15 whole minutes.
At this point in the conversation, I was already shouting in my pathetic little brain…NEXT!!!!!! But wanting to toy with the moron I decided to play the game. So I said, “How about if I come to your place this weekend and we can have all day”.
He launched into seven…yes, seven…different excuses as to why it would NEVER be good to meet at his place. Then he said the dreaded line that hits a nerve every time for me…We are mature adults…why can’t we just get together and play?
Since when is random sex a metrics by which we should be measuring our maturity level?
If I say no, does that imply that I am not a mature adult and that something is wrong with me?
If I say yes, will that cause me to be more valued as a mature person?
By the time I got off the phone, I was so disgusted with his attitude that there was something wrong with me because I wasn’t willing to just lay down and “do it” because I might enjoy it…well, I politely hung up as he was saying…well call me when you have more time and I’ll get on the ferry right away.
Then it hit me…why is he so adamant about doing it at my house and isn’t interested at all in bringing me into his world?
I suppose I should feel proud of myself that my self-esteem appears to be getting healthy enough that his manipulations didn’t make me skip a beat. I suppose I should feel proud of myself that I’m seeing red flags and recognizing that they are such. I suppose I should feel proud that my life is going well enough that this was only a blip!
But still, for a few days there I wanted to know…WHERE THE HELL DID THAT MAN GO THAT WAS SO WONDERFUL ON MY BIRTHDAY AND WHO REPLACED HIM WITH A CRAIGSLIST MORON!!!!
Vent and update over…you may resume your regularly scheduled lives...aren't you glad you asked? (She says with a snicker)
I guess the first thing I must ask is why men seem to think that sending a picture of the penis is inviting in any way to a woman.
Please ladies, let’s see a show of hands as to if any of you have pursued a relationship with someone based on a picture of their nether regions.
I don’t get it. I just don’t. Mr. CraigsList, who was my birthday delight, turned into a nutcase of Biblical proportions. He sent me a picture on the following Monday night of his nether regions. Only it wasn’t a rock hard, “come here baby I miss you” picture….it was an “I just got out of a cold pool” picture. The sucker was less than two inches.
One, I’d already told him that I chose him because he DIDN’T send me a picture like that when I was advertising for a dinner date. Did he forget that? Or maybe I should ask, "How does one forget something like that"?
When we talked a few days later, I expressed again how much I don’t appreciate that sort of stuff except it is way fun when my friends and I get together and drink while comparing the absurdity of even publishing something like that on the internet. I mean for goodness sake, this man is in his 60’s. I told him once again how those types of pictures always make me wonder how many other women have been sent that picture. I mean really!
His response…."What are you doing Wednesday night? I know your kids are gone so would you like to pick me up at the ferry and I can keep you warm in your bed?"
Alrighty let’s review…
Drive to ferry after my children leave – ½ hour
Drive back to my place – ½ hour
Chitchat as I show him around and then chitchat as we are putting our clothes back on – ½ hour
Drive back to the ferry to drop Mr. CraigsList off – ½ hour
Drive back home before my children get home – ½ hour.
That leaves us 15 minutes for sex. Yes ladies….15 whole minutes.
At this point in the conversation, I was already shouting in my pathetic little brain…NEXT!!!!!! But wanting to toy with the moron I decided to play the game. So I said, “How about if I come to your place this weekend and we can have all day”.
He launched into seven…yes, seven…different excuses as to why it would NEVER be good to meet at his place. Then he said the dreaded line that hits a nerve every time for me…We are mature adults…why can’t we just get together and play?
Since when is random sex a metrics by which we should be measuring our maturity level?
If I say no, does that imply that I am not a mature adult and that something is wrong with me?
If I say yes, will that cause me to be more valued as a mature person?
By the time I got off the phone, I was so disgusted with his attitude that there was something wrong with me because I wasn’t willing to just lay down and “do it” because I might enjoy it…well, I politely hung up as he was saying…well call me when you have more time and I’ll get on the ferry right away.
Then it hit me…why is he so adamant about doing it at my house and isn’t interested at all in bringing me into his world?
I suppose I should feel proud of myself that my self-esteem appears to be getting healthy enough that his manipulations didn’t make me skip a beat. I suppose I should feel proud of myself that I’m seeing red flags and recognizing that they are such. I suppose I should feel proud that my life is going well enough that this was only a blip!
But still, for a few days there I wanted to know…WHERE THE HELL DID THAT MAN GO THAT WAS SO WONDERFUL ON MY BIRTHDAY AND WHO REPLACED HIM WITH A CRAIGSLIST MORON!!!!
Vent and update over…you may resume your regularly scheduled lives...aren't you glad you asked? (She says with a snicker)
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